Ahh, the meme I promised since I can't really think of anything else to write.
Sadly, I still can't find appropriate pictures for star_jrock's meme but Kaliababy I will tryyyy! ♥

But for now, here's a meme chirorichan tagged me with.

Ten things that I wish I could say to ten different people right now:

Ø1. I don't know why but of all the people who've thrown me shit, you're pretty much my biggest disappointment. If it's because I actually tried to be there for you only for my advices to be ignored or shrugged off, or that I actually love you way too much to stand seeing you break down infront of me. You were right, maybe we shouldn't be friends. We're far too different, weren't we? You're too careless, I'm too calculating. I always think, you almost dont and surely I can list out all the things where you and I differ, but I think the fact that you're one of the few friends I actually treasured beats them all and I don't know if I should be happy or sad about it.

And now you're lonely. So damn lonely that I can freakin' sense it till up here. But I'm not gonna do something about it. You should do something about it. Stop depending on people to make your life easier because that's your job.

Ø2. Sometimes, you make me wish we're not related by blood.

Ø3. Anger management, bitch. You need one.

Ø4. I don't know what happened to you, either. We used to be really good friends but lately you've always been aggressive towards everything I say. It feels like every talk is an argument with you and I don't know if I was starting to seem like a walking contradiction for you or you're just trying wayy too hard to prove something as if it gets you fucking off or something. FR-FCKNG-SRS.

Ø5. You seem to have developed a habit of making me wonder if you care about me as much as I care about you. No, really. Sometimes you make me wonder if I really am straight. o____O;

Ø6. You're actually pretty likable when you're not insecure.

Ø7. Thank you so much for everything. You've always been so kind to me and I'm glad that I met you.

Ø8. I'm sorry that I'm giving up on you. I'm sorry that the last time we talked will surely be the last time. I'm sorry but this just isn't going to work.

Ø9. It had been a while. How's touring around the world? Not that I still care but...

1Ø. I think there is a chance that I kind of--sort of, quite possibly, might be inlove with you. And I know you probably know that, but uh...yeah. I just feel like saying. o___O;

Nine things about myself:

Ø1. I don't think when I act.
Ø2. My days consist of 2% worrying and 98% daydreaming.
Ø3. I'm a picky eater.
Ø4. I have a bad sense of style.
Ø5. Watching television depresses me.
Ø6. I'm never really going to be pretty enough in my own eyes.
Ø7. I have an obsessive/addictive personality and I believe flailing over jrockers could never justify that. Maybe if I'd tell you how my dad has to hide all of our cough syrup back when I was six just so I wouldn't drink it all by myself? Or that I've taken two pills of Tegretol just for the fucking fun of it? For me it doesn't really sound as serious as it may seem since I'm getting by, but...I dont know. I think my main problem was, once I've started I couldn't stop. *shrugs*
Ø8. Despite all that, I'm always, naturally happy. ^^
Ø9. I've fallen inlove with men I am yet to meet.

Eight ways to win my heart:

Ø1. Take me to new places.
Ø2. Teach me things I'm never gonna learn from somebody else.
Ø3. Be totally, TOTALLY hot. xDDDDD
Ø4. Musically-inclined.
Ø5. Smart. Someone who could make me sigh to myself, not the other way around.
Ø6. Gentle.
Ø7. Warm.
Ø8. Unattached. Because I want you all for myself.

Seven things that cross my mind a lot:

Ø1. the Gazette.
Ø2. Sex.
Ø3. My stories.
Ø4. Death.
Ø5. Poverty.
Ø6. What Philippines had become.
Ø7. Random things.

Six things I do before I fall asleep: I don't really have sleeping routines.

Five people who mean a lot:

Ø1. Dad.
Ø2. Mom.
Ø3. Best friend.
Ø4. My pet(s).
Ø5. .......

Four things I'm wearing right now:

Ø1. brown tank top.
Ø2. Pajamas.
Ø3. Red socks.
Ø4. ....Nothing else. xDDD

Three songs I listen often to:

Ø1. Do me more - Namie Amuro ( lol w-addams13 , I don't know if I'd love you or hate you for introducing me to this song. This isn't my type of music but duuude, the pole-dancing unicorns got me. Hahahha!)
Ø2. Mugen No Hana -alice nine.
Ø3. Guren - the GazettE

Two things I want to do before I die:

Ø1. Travel the world.
Ø2. Outgrow my fears.

One confession:

I only watch gay porn. YAY FOR TWIN DONGS!

...*grins* Sorry if there's too much rage in some of the answers. I has ange issues. 8DDD

...No, really. (>_____>;)

ラベル: bawwww, capslock lol, fuckery fuck fuck, ily, maaad duckie, memetiemzzz, raggeeee, useless worthless babblings

CURRENT MOOD: [ Dorky ]
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: 紅蓮 - the GazettE

Why hello there, ladies and gents. ^^
I was supposed, and pretty much intended to post something yesterday but it seems like my writing mojo went of some vacation of sorts, and I couldn't seem to pour in the right words. Not like I ever wrote anything 'right' in any of my entries anyway, but you get the idea. *nods*

But I think I'm okay now. I bet the horrible headache from yesterday was the major reason behind it. If it's because of the dry weather or my contacts screwing up with my head, I can't really tell. I believe it'll take a while for me to get used to wearing contacts for 10 hours or so every day, pretty much I'm gonna have to endure it until then.

Anyways,
Nothing really happened yesterday, except that Rachel and I went out to register (for voting next year) and well, some peculiar things happened. One of which is how I tried my best to endure the perplexed stares of people around me, not only because I'm wearing a rather surprising pair of contacts but because it's rare for people to see me wearing a skirt. And although I detest how they acted all ignorant around me (for fuck's sake, I am soo not the only person who wore a skirt on that day! DDD8), I guess it was also partly my fault. The skirt was about 4 inches ABOVE my knee, which is pretty vulgar on that sense alone, plus it didn't also help that I have really long legs and well, I guess they were intrigued. *shrugs*

Me and Rach weren't at all lucky enough to meet nice people on that day either. To cut the long rant short, people at COMELEC were acting like grumpy bitches who desperately need a lay. Well, not at first though, since when we got there they were pretty much chattering gleefully at each other and the only time things got a little awkward was when we went up to them to ask something, and some old, fugly lady answered me in a rather sarcastic way that neither Rachel nor I fancied.

Normally, or rather when I'm on a good mood, I'd just smile kindly and curse them mercilessly under my breath but since it had been a bitching day to start with, I pretty much involved myself in a glaring contest with everyone in the office. When they all laughed at the fugly lady's not-so-funny remark, I found averting my gaze at Rachel and coincidentally she turned to me as well, and I can soo recall how I prayed for all saints and deities around me to give me strength not to trample the bitch as I did. But sadly, God sent only a handful on my way, but they were enough to not let sharp words roll over my tongue, at least. I just huffed tiredly and glared, and thankfully though it had been enough for them since they went quiet all of the freakin' sudden, and finally went on to entertaining our questions just like how they're fucking paid for.

Everything went smooth till then and although I could still catch a few stolen glances and murmurs I didn't bother with it anymore. They're all grown ups, hence I expected them to act like one but obviously they didn't. I had to put them in their place and have them know that there's noo way they could mess with a girl with green eyes and blood red hair and get fucking away with it. Seriouslyyyy. (.___. )

*sighs* But like I said, I'm okay now.
I dont usually get ticked off over trivial things like that, but a part of me ached to do something about it. I'm pretty much that type of person; if someone's really nice to me, I'd give them a piece of my nice and sweet self, but if they start bitching and acting like a total a-hole around me, I'd be more than glad to show them my vilest, meanest, most evil side.

In my world, people get what they deserve. *nods*

Oh well, IN OTHER NEWS
I had a pretty slamming day. ^^
I met up with Rachel again, since I've been wanting to see her "new look". And sadly, I think I'm not allowed to go down on details with regards to that, since I'm pretty sure she'll skin me alive if I dare mention that she had some dentist appointment mishap and now her three front teeth's screwed up which makes her look like Chuckie's bride and--OH SHIT! YOU TRICKED MEE!!! DDD8

....Lol.
And I guess that's it. xDDDD
I seriously need to pee right now since I've been drinking iced tea all day that it makes me wiss like I'm nursing some goddamn aquarium inside my gull bladder. And I've been holding it in all the while that I've been writing this and I seriously need to--

Okay, wait. One last thing!

Why, yesh. That is indeed Duck-chan, slutting it up duckie-style in a pose. ♥
I think I'm gonna fanmail this picture to both Byou and Uruha, just so they'd be informed that I can actually pull off a better duck pose than both of them combined. HAH!

/fail. *gets shot*

ラベル: being a happy twat, byou is a ho♥, fuckery fuck fuck, hah bloody hah, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, this is srs bsns, uruduckie♥, useless worthless babblings

I just watched the Finale of America's Next Top Model and had the biggest, BIGGEST disappointment regarding the show.

ALLISON SHOULD HAVE FAKEN WON I CAN'T BELIEVE EEETTT!!!11! DDDDD:

Shitfuck, I hate how everything and even the judging part scream Allison to win but for some fucked up reason she didn't and I can't even comprehend where they pull out that fucked up decision. I mean, I like Teyona and I think she's an amazing model but when it came down to the Final two, Allison did put up a MUCH better show. She was consistent, unique, fresh, unpredictable,, haute fucking couture and yet she didn't freakin' won?!?!

How fucked up can that be? DDD:
S-she was my girlcrush! *criezzzz*

/rant.

ラベル: bawwww, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, shit happens, this is srs bsns, useless worthless babblings

CURRENT MOOD: [ Bitchy ]
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: Blue Star - Vidoll

This update may come out as a bit of a ranty post, or more so, a shameless expose' of my most recent epiphany (READ: 5 minutes ago). And it involves some people. ALOT of people, actually. People who, regrettably, have been given access to my blog now, which is why it took me a while to think about whether I should post this or not. I might--no, I will wind up hurting other people's feelings with what I'm about to say, and I know I'm bound to regret this later. But I know myself well, just like everybody else here, and I know that when times like these come along, my only resolve is a shrug of my shoulders and an "I don't give a flying fuck."

For a start,
I....don't fancy people disrespecting my fandom.
I know that's probably too damn vague to comprehend but the thing is, for the past few days I've been mingling (or at least trying to mingle) with some people I used to share the same fanbase with. And I was really happy, seeing old acquaintances and meeting few new ones, and it gets me excited knowing that I gained another reason to stay online as long as I used to do, seeing as I'm starting to lose my affection towards the internet. It was refreshing, to say the least.

But after a while, I felt something rather...peculiar. And I know it was probably just me and my paranoid self, the good ol' Gracie who constantly thinks everyone is after her, that's why I tried my best to shun the thought, set it aside and tried my best to enjoy things the way I did a few days ago. But the more I've observed, the more I noticed it. And I know they might have not been doing this on purpose but I felt like my new fandom is being inadvertently mocked.

The petty comments, unwatched words, careless claims...although they were minor, it got to me somehow. Probably it was just me, being all used to Livejournal communities where we're united by adoration of the same fandom. Sure, there were disagreements, conflicts of beliefs and opinions, unnecessary drama, but there's still no denying that we love the same band, and no matter how many times you've crossed a certain user, the previous arguments will be out the window the moment the issue dies, and most of us would just bury the hatchet and forget everything, just like how mature people should act. Everyone respects everybody.

Perhaps I was just so used to it that this new-found way of interaction took me aback. And the fact that I can't just reply to them and give my two cents without sounding like a complete drama queen made it all too damn frustrating to handle. And blah, I dont know, really. I wanted to understand, because I know I'm better than this, getting all worked up by teenagers who don't even know what they're talking about but I can't help but be disappointed.

The thing is, if you don't like something, either shut up about it or accept it with open arms. I didn't really appreciate how things got down, in a way that again, maybe done unconsciously but it somehow degraded other people's interests. I know that I may not be the one to talk, seeing as how much of a loose canon I, too could be but I'd always try and rationalize my claims. I won't leave it hanging into thin air and ignore whoever got offended because I value their opinions and interests just as much as I want them to value mine.

It was my fault, I know. Now that I'm different, now that I'm oblivious of how that world works now. I guess there's no sense of blaming anyone but myself. Hence, today will pretty much be the last time I'd be talking to them. I dont want to verge into a world I can't understand anymore.

....*le sigh*
And pretty much I realized this may be the exact reason why I'm feeling so shitty recently. It may sound shallow to many, but it frustrates me everytime I fail to express what I truly feel. And that's the reason why I decided to blog about it. I just...needed to get it out of my chest, I guess.

IN OTHAR NEWS:::
WE WATCHED ANGELS AND DEMONSSS!!11!!! xDDD
Okay, quite a little late since we did it last Friday but due to my effeminate sensibilities, I failed to babble about it just like I'm supposed to. (.___.)

But to sum it all up?
OMGZ IT SUCKS SO MUCH RAT BALLS THAT I FEEL LIKE SHOOTING MYSELF IN THE ANUS. :C I could forgive how they butchered the plot, changed the events and made it a sequel instead of a prequel, thus ruining alot of characterizations and timelines, but what I could not forgive is how they pretty much eliminated 2 of the most important characters in the story. Also, with how they killed Carlo Ventresca's true reason behind his evil scheme, which is pretty much the biggest twist in the story itself.

And above everything else, the speech. The motherfucking, moving, amazing, magical speech isn't there. Nowhere. Nada! Can't be found anyfuckingwhere and really, if I wasn't seating next to Gennell whom I love dearly (♥ xDDD) I might have strangled whoever unlucky person next to me. Seriouslyyyyy. DDDD:

It was just a mess, really. And see how I didn't even bother to put spoilers? It's because I really want people to read this ahead before they barge into the nearest theatre, buy those overpriced tickets and waste two and a half hours off of their precious, precious time. It was a big disappointment, seeing as how much I like the book. True, not the best I've read (Nothing beats The Kite Runner for me, really) but for a thriller/adventure/suspense/drama it's quite a decent one.

And I guess that's it. I ranted enough. *stuffs fist in my mouth*
Maybe I should work on my stories more. Writing is an awesome outlet, ehh. But um, err...we'll see.

Bye, stupids. 8DDDD

ラベル: bawwww, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, shit happens, this is srs bsns, useless worthless babblings, wtf

Ahh, the meme I promised since I can't really think of anything else to write.
Sadly, I still can't find appropriate pictures for star_jrock's meme but Kaliababy I will tryyyy! ♥

But for now, here's a meme chirorichan tagged me with.

Ten things that I wish I could say to ten different people right now:

Ø1. I don't know why but of all the people who've thrown me shit, you're pretty much my biggest disappointment. If it's because I actually tried to be there for you only for my advices to be ignored or shrugged off, or that I actually love you way too much to stand seeing you break down infront of me. You were right, maybe we shouldn't be friends. We're far too different, weren't we? You're too careless, I'm too calculating. I always think, you almost dont and surely I can list out all the things where you and I differ, but I think the fact that you're one of the few friends I actually treasured beats them all and I don't know if I should be happy or sad about it.

And now you're lonely. So damn lonely that I can freakin' sense it till up here. But I'm not gonna do something about it. You should do something about it. Stop depending on people to make your life easier because that's your job.

Ø2. Sometimes, you make me wish we're not related by blood.

Ø3. Anger management, bitch. You need one.

Ø4. I don't know what happened to you, either. We used to be really good friends but lately you've always been aggressive towards everything I say. It feels like every talk is an argument with you and I don't know if I was starting to seem like a walking contradiction for you or you're just trying wayy too hard to prove something as if it gets you fucking off or something. FR-FCKNG-SRS.

Ø5. You seem to have developed a habit of making me wonder if you care about me as much as I care about you. No, really. Sometimes you make me wonder if I really am straight. o____O;

Ø6. You're actually pretty likable when you're not insecure.

Ø7. Thank you so much for everything. You've always been so kind to me and I'm glad that I met you.

Ø8. I'm sorry that I'm giving up on you. I'm sorry that the last time we talked will surely be the last time. I'm sorry but this just isn't going to work.

Ø9. It had been a while. How's touring around the world? Not that I still care but...

1Ø. I think there is a chance that I kind of--sort of, quite possibly, might be inlove with you. And I know you probably know that, but uh...yeah. I just feel like saying. o___O;

Nine things about myself:

Ø1. I don't think when I act.
Ø2. My days consist of 2% worrying and 98% daydreaming.
Ø3. I'm a picky eater.
Ø4. I have a bad sense of style.
Ø5. Watching television depresses me.
Ø6. I'm never really going to be pretty enough in my own eyes.
Ø7. I have an obsessive/addictive personality and I believe flailing over jrockers could never justify that. Maybe if I'd tell you how my dad has to hide all of our cough syrup back when I was six just so I wouldn't drink it all by myself? Or that I've taken two pills of Tegretol just for the fucking fun of it? For me it doesn't really sound as serious as it may seem since I'm getting by, but...I dont know. I think my main problem was, once I've started I couldn't stop. *shrugs*
Ø8. Despite all that, I'm always, naturally happy. ^^
Ø9. I've fallen inlove with men I am yet to meet.

Eight ways to win my heart:

Ø1. Take me to new places.
Ø2. Teach me things I'm never gonna learn from somebody else.
Ø3. Be totally, TOTALLY hot. xDDDDD
Ø4. Musically-inclined.
Ø5. Smart. Someone who could make me sigh to myself, not the other way around.
Ø6. Gentle.
Ø7. Warm.
Ø8. Unattached. Because I want you all for myself.

Seven things that cross my mind a lot:

Ø1. the Gazette.
Ø2. Sex.
Ø3. My stories.
Ø4. Death.
Ø5. Poverty.
Ø6. What Philippines had become.
Ø7. Random things.

Six things I do before I fall asleep: I don't really have sleeping routines.

Five people who mean a lot:

Ø1. Dad.
Ø2. Mom.
Ø3. Best friend.
Ø4. My pet(s).
Ø5. .......

Four things I'm wearing right now:

Ø1. brown tank top.
Ø2. Pajamas.
Ø3. Red socks.
Ø4. ....Nothing else. xDDD

Three songs I listen often to:

Ø1. Do me more - Namie Amuro ( lol w-addams13 , I don't know if I'd love you or hate you for introducing me to this song. This isn't my type of music but duuude, the pole-dancing unicorns got me. Hahahha!)
Ø2. Mugen No Hana -alice nine.
Ø3. Guren - the GazettE

Two things I want to do before I die:

Ø1. Travel the world.
Ø2. Outgrow my fears.

One confession:

I only watch gay porn. YAY FOR TWIN DONGS!

...*grins* Sorry if there's too much rage in some of the answers. I has ange issues. 8DDD

...No, really. (>_____>;)

ラベル: bawwww, capslock lol, fuckery fuck fuck, ily, maaad duckie, memetiemzzz, raggeeee, useless worthless babblings

CURRENT MOOD: [ Dorky ]
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: 紅蓮 - the GazettE

Why hello there, ladies and gents. ^^
I was supposed, and pretty much intended to post something yesterday but it seems like my writing mojo went of some vacation of sorts, and I couldn't seem to pour in the right words. Not like I ever wrote anything 'right' in any of my entries anyway, but you get the idea. *nods*

But I think I'm okay now. I bet the horrible headache from yesterday was the major reason behind it. If it's because of the dry weather or my contacts screwing up with my head, I can't really tell. I believe it'll take a while for me to get used to wearing contacts for 10 hours or so every day, pretty much I'm gonna have to endure it until then.

Anyways,
Nothing really happened yesterday, except that Rachel and I went out to register (for voting next year) and well, some peculiar things happened. One of which is how I tried my best to endure the perplexed stares of people around me, not only because I'm wearing a rather surprising pair of contacts but because it's rare for people to see me wearing a skirt. And although I detest how they acted all ignorant around me (for fuck's sake, I am soo not the only person who wore a skirt on that day! DDD8), I guess it was also partly my fault. The skirt was about 4 inches ABOVE my knee, which is pretty vulgar on that sense alone, plus it didn't also help that I have really long legs and well, I guess they were intrigued. *shrugs*

Me and Rach weren't at all lucky enough to meet nice people on that day either. To cut the long rant short, people at COMELEC were acting like grumpy bitches who desperately need a lay. Well, not at first though, since when we got there they were pretty much chattering gleefully at each other and the only time things got a little awkward was when we went up to them to ask something, and some old, fugly lady answered me in a rather sarcastic way that neither Rachel nor I fancied.

Normally, or rather when I'm on a good mood, I'd just smile kindly and curse them mercilessly under my breath but since it had been a bitching day to start with, I pretty much involved myself in a glaring contest with everyone in the office. When they all laughed at the fugly lady's not-so-funny remark, I found averting my gaze at Rachel and coincidentally she turned to me as well, and I can soo recall how I prayed for all saints and deities around me to give me strength not to trample the bitch as I did. But sadly, God sent only a handful on my way, but they were enough to not let sharp words roll over my tongue, at least. I just huffed tiredly and glared, and thankfully though it had been enough for them since they went quiet all of the freakin' sudden, and finally went on to entertaining our questions just like how they're fucking paid for.

Everything went smooth till then and although I could still catch a few stolen glances and murmurs I didn't bother with it anymore. They're all grown ups, hence I expected them to act like one but obviously they didn't. I had to put them in their place and have them know that there's noo way they could mess with a girl with green eyes and blood red hair and get fucking away with it. Seriouslyyyy. (.___. )

*sighs* But like I said, I'm okay now.
I dont usually get ticked off over trivial things like that, but a part of me ached to do something about it. I'm pretty much that type of person; if someone's really nice to me, I'd give them a piece of my nice and sweet self, but if they start bitching and acting like a total a-hole around me, I'd be more than glad to show them my vilest, meanest, most evil side.

In my world, people get what they deserve. *nods*

Oh well, IN OTHER NEWS
I had a pretty slamming day. ^^
I met up with Rachel again, since I've been wanting to see her "new look". And sadly, I think I'm not allowed to go down on details with regards to that, since I'm pretty sure she'll skin me alive if I dare mention that she had some dentist appointment mishap and now her three front teeth's screwed up which makes her look like Chuckie's bride and--OH SHIT! YOU TRICKED MEE!!! DDD8

....Lol.
And I guess that's it. xDDDD
I seriously need to pee right now since I've been drinking iced tea all day that it makes me wiss like I'm nursing some goddamn aquarium inside my gull bladder. And I've been holding it in all the while that I've been writing this and I seriously need to--

Okay, wait. One last thing!

Why, yesh. That is indeed Duck-chan, slutting it up duckie-style in a pose. ♥
I think I'm gonna fanmail this picture to both Byou and Uruha, just so they'd be informed that I can actually pull off a better duck pose than both of them combined. HAH!

/fail. *gets shot*

ラベル: being a happy twat, byou is a ho♥, fuckery fuck fuck, hah bloody hah, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, this is srs bsns, uruduckie♥, useless worthless babblings

I just watched the Finale of America's Next Top Model and had the biggest, BIGGEST disappointment regarding the show.

ALLISON SHOULD HAVE FAKEN WON I CAN'T BELIEVE EEETTT!!!11! DDDDD:

Shitfuck, I hate how everything and even the judging part scream Allison to win but for some fucked up reason she didn't and I can't even comprehend where they pull out that fucked up decision. I mean, I like Teyona and I think she's an amazing model but when it came down to the Final two, Allison did put up a MUCH better show. She was consistent, unique, fresh, unpredictable,, haute fucking couture and yet she didn't freakin' won?!?!

How fucked up can that be? DDD:
S-she was my girlcrush! *criezzzz*

/rant.

ラベル: bawwww, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, shit happens, this is srs bsns, useless worthless babblings

CURRENT MOOD: [ Bitchy ]
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: Blue Star - Vidoll

This update may come out as a bit of a ranty post, or more so, a shameless expose' of my most recent epiphany (READ: 5 minutes ago). And it involves some people. ALOT of people, actually. People who, regrettably, have been given access to my blog now, which is why it took me a while to think about whether I should post this or not. I might--no, I will wind up hurting other people's feelings with what I'm about to say, and I know I'm bound to regret this later. But I know myself well, just like everybody else here, and I know that when times like these come along, my only resolve is a shrug of my shoulders and an "I don't give a flying fuck."

For a start,
I....don't fancy people disrespecting my fandom.
I know that's probably too damn vague to comprehend but the thing is, for the past few days I've been mingling (or at least trying to mingle) with some people I used to share the same fanbase with. And I was really happy, seeing old acquaintances and meeting few new ones, and it gets me excited knowing that I gained another reason to stay online as long as I used to do, seeing as I'm starting to lose my affection towards the internet. It was refreshing, to say the least.

But after a while, I felt something rather...peculiar. And I know it was probably just me and my paranoid self, the good ol' Gracie who constantly thinks everyone is after her, that's why I tried my best to shun the thought, set it aside and tried my best to enjoy things the way I did a few days ago. But the more I've observed, the more I noticed it. And I know they might have not been doing this on purpose but I felt like my new fandom is being inadvertently mocked.

The petty comments, unwatched words, careless claims...although they were minor, it got to me somehow. Probably it was just me, being all used to Livejournal communities where we're united by adoration of the same fandom. Sure, there were disagreements, conflicts of beliefs and opinions, unnecessary drama, but there's still no denying that we love the same band, and no matter how many times you've crossed a certain user, the previous arguments will be out the window the moment the issue dies, and most of us would just bury the hatchet and forget everything, just like how mature people should act. Everyone respects everybody.

Perhaps I was just so used to it that this new-found way of interaction took me aback. And the fact that I can't just reply to them and give my two cents without sounding like a complete drama queen made it all too damn frustrating to handle. And blah, I dont know, really. I wanted to understand, because I know I'm better than this, getting all worked up by teenagers who don't even know what they're talking about but I can't help but be disappointed.

The thing is, if you don't like something, either shut up about it or accept it with open arms. I didn't really appreciate how things got down, in a way that again, maybe done unconsciously but it somehow degraded other people's interests. I know that I may not be the one to talk, seeing as how much of a loose canon I, too could be but I'd always try and rationalize my claims. I won't leave it hanging into thin air and ignore whoever got offended because I value their opinions and interests just as much as I want them to value mine.

It was my fault, I know. Now that I'm different, now that I'm oblivious of how that world works now. I guess there's no sense of blaming anyone but myself. Hence, today will pretty much be the last time I'd be talking to them. I dont want to verge into a world I can't understand anymore.

....*le sigh*
And pretty much I realized this may be the exact reason why I'm feeling so shitty recently. It may sound shallow to many, but it frustrates me everytime I fail to express what I truly feel. And that's the reason why I decided to blog about it. I just...needed to get it out of my chest, I guess.

IN OTHAR NEWS:::
WE WATCHED ANGELS AND DEMONSSS!!11!!! xDDD
Okay, quite a little late since we did it last Friday but due to my effeminate sensibilities, I failed to babble about it just like I'm supposed to. (.___.)

But to sum it all up?
OMGZ IT SUCKS SO MUCH RAT BALLS THAT I FEEL LIKE SHOOTING MYSELF IN THE ANUS. :C I could forgive how they butchered the plot, changed the events and made it a sequel instead of a prequel, thus ruining alot of characterizations and timelines, but what I could not forgive is how they pretty much eliminated 2 of the most important characters in the story. Also, with how they killed Carlo Ventresca's true reason behind his evil scheme, which is pretty much the biggest twist in the story itself.

And above everything else, the speech. The motherfucking, moving, amazing, magical speech isn't there. Nowhere. Nada! Can't be found anyfuckingwhere and really, if I wasn't seating next to Gennell whom I love dearly (♥ xDDD) I might have strangled whoever unlucky person next to me. Seriouslyyyyy. DDDD:

It was just a mess, really. And see how I didn't even bother to put spoilers? It's because I really want people to read this ahead before they barge into the nearest theatre, buy those overpriced tickets and waste two and a half hours off of their precious, precious time. It was a big disappointment, seeing as how much I like the book. True, not the best I've read (Nothing beats The Kite Runner for me, really) but for a thriller/adventure/suspense/drama it's quite a decent one.

And I guess that's it. I ranted enough. *stuffs fist in my mouth*
Maybe I should work on my stories more. Writing is an awesome outlet, ehh. But um, err...we'll see.

Bye, stupids. 8DDDD

ラベル: bawwww, i bitch, maaad duckie, raggeeee, shit happens, this is srs bsns, useless worthless babblings, wtf